Sunday, 21 October 2012

Madonna Calls off Second Leg of Tour Due to Controversial Slaying of Seventeen

Madonna, no stranger to courting publicity with her outrageous antics and tabloid-baiting stunts, has called off the second leg of her recent American tour after gunning down seventeen people in Colorado on Tuesday.

Madonna takes aim at fans (and preconceptions)

The concert, which Rolling Stone called ‘a startling post feminist deconstruction of patriarchal gun culture’ has been pilloried as insensitive in the wake of the Aurora massacre, with many calling for a public apology and ticket refunds for the repeated act of premeditated murder.

It was during the finale of the show in which Madonna , backed by a a David Guetta produced Rn’B track and carried on stage by a cadre of dancers dressed alternately in Virginia Tech and Columbine High school T-shirts that the singer produced two large caliber revolvers from behind a tuba and began her ironic bloodbath.

Stopping once to reload the twin Smith and Wesson model 625s and transition into the chorus of ‘Like a Prayer’, Madonna fired continuously into the crowd for upwards of two minutes, wounding thirty two and killing seventeen. It is thought that the nature of the spectacle prevented many from believing in the stunt and leaving. Thus, in the wake of the tragic concert many witnesses confessed to dancing through the bloodshed and, in many cases, on the throats of the injured pop fans.

Among the deceased are Jerry Falhallow, 57 a retired butcher for whom the tickets were a birthday present. Other confirmed fatalities include Thalidia Junt, 22, a student and part-time butcher, Orwent Roys, 19, an apprentice meat wholesaler from Philadelphia, Denton Thuggs, 34, a retired meat shop owner from Alaska and Delia Thistlebush, a rabid Madonna fan  whose friends describe her as a ‘fun loving and vivacious butcher in the prime of her life’.

Madonna finishing off a troublesome fan

Though many fled the initial slaughter, many die-hard fans stayed throughout and were reportedly treated to three encores  and an acoustic version of ‘Erotica’, which a local music reviewer called ‘haunting’.

Despite the furore from newspapers and high ranking police, Madonna has refused to apologize for the slayings and claims that the cancellation of three of her upcoming tour dates were entirely due to exhaustion and injury to the wrists which she sufferred by dual wielding such large firearms.

Still, many cultural commentators defend the actions of Madonna. Speaking today to the family of  one of the deceased butchers, cultural commentator and rave fan David Johnboy said, “Madonna has always pushed the envelope, whether it’s with the publication of a book in which she gets her baps out, or its with her daring choices in bras, or with her performance in Swept Away, or with the choice to confront America with its obsession with firearms by shooting indiscriminately into a crowd over the song ‘Flange!' from the multi platinum selling Ray of Light album.”

As authorities approached, Madonna made a swift exit

“It was clearly a provocative decision to shoot seventeen people in Colorado after Aurora, but Madonna has never shied away from controversy, and is always willing to make a statement even if it incenses the self appointed guardians of morality or results in a homicide investigation.”

“It was clear that this massacre was a post modern examination on the nature of massacres.’
Still, many have criticised Madonna not on the basis of her bodycount but on her apparent lack of relevance. Kim Polyp from NME told us, “This is a sad story of a star trying to cling on to the cutting edge and not looking terribly dignified doing so. Last week Lady Gaga poisoned Gotham’s reservoir, having left the city’s police a series of devious musical clues in the forms of songs about being nice to gays. That killed three hundred and fouty five people and she’s at the top of the iTunes sales charts.”

“Madge has had her day, this derivative shooting is just proof of that.”


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